John was in the egg business.
He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize them. He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells.
John's favorite rooster, Obama, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed Obama's bell hadn't rung at all! When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
To John's amazement, Obama had thought of a way to do it without work; he had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of Obama, he entered him in the Chicago County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges. The result was the judges not only awarded Obama the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pullet Surprise as well.
Clearly Obama was a politician. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.
Vote carefully.
The Downgraded Child President Says Hi
Try And Tell Me Dems Aren't In The Union Pocket
@keder :But don't worry, these Democrats all have your best interests at heart: http://bit.ly/qrSbc0Thanks to @keder for providing the link to some interesting reading.#TakeWallStreet#OurWallStreet#p2
Barry Soetoro screams at us each week about jobs. Notice he never clarifies what and whose jobs? He'll qualify the word jobs only so much as "shovel ready". He isn't talking about jobs at local mom and pop shops, or medium businesses or even big business (you know, those evil rich people that hire people that actually work).
He's talking about Union jobs. The only jobs he gives a shit about are the Union thugs that drive companies out of this country and into countries that appreciate business. It's also a lot easier to hide illegals in Unions...Barry is making sure of that in the newest bill we screamed us down with. It's class warfare, Union thugery and nothing else.
This economy is wasting away...and all Barry can do is try to keep his promise to his Chicago Union goons that he'll keep them funded by stealing from the idiots that voted for him - and in turn those that didn't because they knew what he was all about to begin with.
The rest of us, that realize Unions have destroyed this country, can go bugger ourselves as far as Barry Soetoro is concerned.
Obama + The Constitution = Toilet Paper
I hate you and your stupid Constitution |
So anyway, the Washington Times had a nice Op/Ed piece from writer Robert Knight listing the ways in which this donkey has either ignored, violated or otherwise defecated upon your Constitution. You see, the Constitution was put in place so people like him cannot gain power. It's basically an instruction manual for avoiding a Barrack Obama.
It's almost like when they were writing it, they had just gotten back from a time travelling experience with Doc and Marty to the year 2011 (because they wanted to see what it was like the year before the Mayan calander ends) and saw the state of the nation. They watched him screaming at Congress on TV (once they got used to the idea of TV, Marty charmingly explained to them what it was because they thought we now keep our presidents trapped in little boxes so they cannot be harmed) and were in shock. They had just fought tirelessly and lost many Americans to gain independence against this type of tyranny, fascism and totalitarianism. They had to do something.
Eat Lead, Slackers |
There was a musical montage in there somewhere as well.
So yeah, Bamm-Bamm has to "dodge, dip, dive, duck, and dodge" the Constitution because it's explicitly, not implicitly, designed to stop people like him.
My Pull List for September 14, 2011
@DanSlott is writing one of the greatest Amazing Spider-Man runs in the title's history.
What a terrible ending to what is arguably one of the greatest Marvel heroes ever. Hundreds upon hundreds of books and the run ends with "Angry White Man". It's a shame.
This, however, is making up for it. Awesome new volume.
Disclaimer in case you're laughing at me: I've never been a big DC reader other than Jonah Hex. So I picked the new #1's that looked like the coolest characters.
ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz.
I think this looks awesome, I love Frankenstein, and whatever SHADE is, I hope it's a cool place to work. Oh yeah, and it's Jeff Fucking Lemire!
This book is a hoot. I LOVE it.
See above disclaimer.
Even without an ending to Choker anywhere in sight, I will buy anything McCool does.
Love me some Punisher. And this title is brutal, fully living up to the MAX imprint.
As creepy a book (comic or otherwise) I've read in a long time. And there's only been one issue so far.
Again, see disclaimer.
Does anything else need to be said about this title? It's awesome.
What a terrible ending to what is arguably one of the greatest Marvel heroes ever. Hundreds upon hundreds of books and the run ends with "Angry White Man". It's a shame.
This, however, is making up for it. Awesome new volume.
Disclaimer in case you're laughing at me: I've never been a big DC reader other than Jonah Hex. So I picked the new #1's that looked like the coolest characters.
ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz.
I think this looks awesome, I love Frankenstein, and whatever SHADE is, I hope it's a cool place to work. Oh yeah, and it's Jeff Fucking Lemire!
This book is a hoot. I LOVE it.
See above disclaimer.
Even without an ending to Choker anywhere in sight, I will buy anything McCool does.
Love me some Punisher. And this title is brutal, fully living up to the MAX imprint.
As creepy a book (comic or otherwise) I've read in a long time. And there's only been one issue so far.
Again, see disclaimer.
Does anything else need to be said about this title? It's awesome.
We Can Only Believe The Actions, Not The Words
What do these actions tell you?
During a moment of silence in London England. Some fuckpuke Islamofascist terrorists decided to disrupt it and put on a little demonstration of their "Religion of Peace:
I'm sure they are simply upset about the treatment of Muslims in the post 9-11 world, right? That they've been victims in all this.
They're outraged that the TSA strip searched a dying cancer patient because she wore adult pullons due to her incontinence. They're probably protesting the fact that a "minority" of them have caused a 4 year old girl to suffer through a stranger stuffing their hands down her pants to check her privates.
These are just the minority, right?
Islam is the Religion of Peace right? Those two guys holding up signs talking about the upcoming domination of Islam are referring to a Polo match, right?
During a moment of silence in London England. Some fuckpuke Islamofascist terrorists decided to disrupt it and put on a little demonstration of their "Religion of Peace:
I'm sure they are simply upset about the treatment of Muslims in the post 9-11 world, right? That they've been victims in all this.
They're outraged that the TSA strip searched a dying cancer patient because she wore adult pullons due to her incontinence. They're probably protesting the fact that a "minority" of them have caused a 4 year old girl to suffer through a stranger stuffing their hands down her pants to check her privates.
These are just the minority, right?
Islam is the Religion of Peace right? Those two guys holding up signs talking about the upcoming domination of Islam are referring to a Polo match, right?
Who Needs Alan Fucking Moore? My Pull List for September 07, 2011
GREAT week, this.
Who needs Alan Moore when we have THE Grant Morrison?
Super excited about this title. Can't wait to see how it works.
The awesomeness of this title continues.
More Morning Goodness please. Thank you.
One of the funniest books I've read in a long time. You are really missing out a burst out laughing read.
This is some quality stuff right here.
Hmm. We shall see.
This book hasn't slowed down for approximately 75 issues.
Who needs Alan Moore when we have THE Grant Morrison?
Super excited about this title. Can't wait to see how it works.
The awesomeness of this title continues.
More Morning Goodness please. Thank you.
One of the funniest books I've read in a long time. You are really missing out a burst out laughing read.
This is some quality stuff right here.
Hmm. We shall see.
This book hasn't slowed down for approximately 75 issues.
Obama After Some Leftist Whackjob Attempts To Murder Congresswoman Giffords
He thinks you're a terrorist. |
He said the political tone in America was "too violent", "too vitriolic" and filled with hate. He swore to live up to the ideals the little girl one of you leftists murdered. The ideal of a politician as a role model and as someone that is inherently good.
Here's a few parts of that speech followed by what he's done, for his part at least, since then to live up to that promise he made to the dead 8 year old girl that was murdered by one of you lefties.
And so deserving of our good example. If this tragedy prompts reflection and debate, as it should, let’s make sure it’s worthy of those we have lost. Let’s make sure it’s not on the usual plane of politics and point scoring and pettiness that drifts away with the next news cycle.
The loss of these wonderful people should make every one of us strive to be better in our private lives - to be better friends and neighbors, co-workers and parents. And if, as has been discussed in recent days, their deaths help usher in more civility in our public discourse, let’s remember that it is not because a simple lack of civility caused this tragedy, but rather because only a more civil and honest public discourse can help us face up to our challenges as a nation, in a way that would make them proud. It should be because we want to live up to the example of public servants like John Roll and Gabby Giffords, who knew first and foremost that we are all Americans, and that we can question each other’s ideas without questioning each other’s love of country, and that our task, working together, is to constantly widen the circle of our concern so that we bequeath the American dream to future generations.
I believe we can be better. Those who died here, those who saved lives here - they help me believe. We may not be able to stop all evil in the world, but I know that how we treat one another is entirely up to us. I believe that for all our imperfections, we are full of decency and goodness, and that the forces that divide us are not as strong as those that unite us.
That’s what I believe, in part because that’s what a child like Christina Taylor Green believed. Imagine: here was a young girl who was just becoming aware of our democracy; just beginning to understand the obligations of citizenship; just starting to glimpse the fact that someday she too might play a part in shaping her nation’s future. She had been elected to her student council; she saw public service as something exciting, something hopeful. She was off to meet her congresswoman, someone she was sure was good and important and might be a role model. She saw all this through the eyes of a child, undimmed by the cynicism or vitriol that we adults all too often just take for granted.
I want us to live up to her expectations. I want our democracy to be as good as she imagined it. All of us - we should do everything we can to make sure this country lives up to our children’s expectations.
Jimmy Hoffa's Introduction of Obama:
“We've got to keep an eye on the battle that we face: The war on workers,” Hoffa said. “And you see it everywhere, it is the tea party. And you know, there is only one way to beat and win that war. The one thing about working people is we like a good fight. And you know what? They've got a war, they've got a war with us and there's only going to be one winner. It's going to be the workers of Michigan, and America. We're going to win that war,” Hoffa said.
“President Obama, this is your army. We are ready to march. Let's take these son of bitches out and give America back to an America where we belong (sic)”
Obama's response:
And the people working hard here, SEIU President Mary Kay Henry, Teamster President Jimmy Hoffa, UAW President Bob King, Utility Workers President Mark Langford, we're proud of you and your congressional delegation.
Vice President Biden calling us terrorists.
Obama's Response.
Congressman Andre Carson’s claims that the tea party supports lynchings.
Obama's Response.
Congresswoman Maxine Waters telling tea party activists to “DIE, GO DIE AND BURN IN HELL!"
Obama's Response.
Yep, he sure is "raising the political discourse". At least he lasted 2 months before the natural way of the left (hate-mongering, one-sided-politics-of-fear-rhetoric, hate speech and intolerance) began to pop up again in his "town hall meetings" and amongst his supporters and your fucking Vice President. At least he's that sweet little man all of you lefty whackos voted for think he is. What a great job he's doing showing that ACTIONS speak louder than SPEECHES.
That last paragraph was sarcasm, in case you leftists didn't get it.
Keep ignoring the facts, lefties, you're losing and losing badly. Keep allowing yourself to be herded into the Party of Hate, Ignorance, Intolerance and Warmongering. You're swell folks. Keep those blinders on, you're not going to want to see how badly your Messiah is going to fail, and how long it will take for your ilk to ever see power again.
You overshot your load, you tried to get the most extreme fundamentalist lefty radical in the office and you succeeded. And we thank you for it. Because true Americans will get back into power...true servants of the people will be back in that office, repair the damage he's done to the citizens of this country, the citizens of our allies and the citizens of countries he wanted to drop bombs on in the interest of oil.
So thank you, again, because it showed what you're all about. You've been exposed as the anti-American, disgusting hate-filled slave-traders you truly are.
Paging Cindy Sheehan....Cindy Sheehan. Paging Cindy Sheehan.
Damaged - Cream Of The Month's Crop
If you're not reading these books, you're missing out:
Scott Synder's "Severed" (Image): Talk about creepy. The first book, comic or otherwise, to actually give me the chills.
Joe Harris' "Spontaneous" (ONI Press): A slacker that works at a mall burger joint can predict when people are going to fall victim to "Spontaneous Human Combustion". Does he help them or warn them? No, he just watches. Oh, and his best friend that helps him track people is one of the people on his list.
David Lapham's "Damaged" (Radical): A GREAT character story about two old school cops trying to deal with the incoming newbies. One of them goes rogue while the other tries to both help and stop him. Full of brotherhood, fatherhood, growing old type themes. A real sleeper, the first issue was amazing.
Jason Ciaramella's "The Cape" (IDW): A super slacker with super powers. He disposes of his first "enemy" in a way you'll never see coming. Hysterical.
Mark Roslan's "Broken Pieces" (Aspen): The USA has been nuked and two doctor's attempt to develop a cure for the damage to people. The way this story is written, it's told through the viewpoints of both doctors - attempting to explain what happened - while we silently follow a "monster" of a human being stitched together from about 30 other people.
Scott Synder's "Severed" (Image): Talk about creepy. The first book, comic or otherwise, to actually give me the chills.
Joe Harris' "Spontaneous" (ONI Press): A slacker that works at a mall burger joint can predict when people are going to fall victim to "Spontaneous Human Combustion". Does he help them or warn them? No, he just watches. Oh, and his best friend that helps him track people is one of the people on his list.
David Lapham's "Damaged" (Radical): A GREAT character story about two old school cops trying to deal with the incoming newbies. One of them goes rogue while the other tries to both help and stop him. Full of brotherhood, fatherhood, growing old type themes. A real sleeper, the first issue was amazing.
Jason Ciaramella's "The Cape" (IDW): A super slacker with super powers. He disposes of his first "enemy" in a way you'll never see coming. Hysterical.
Mark Roslan's "Broken Pieces" (Aspen): The USA has been nuked and two doctor's attempt to develop a cure for the damage to people. The way this story is written, it's told through the viewpoints of both doctors - attempting to explain what happened - while we silently follow a "monster" of a human being stitched together from about 30 other people.
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