Do You People Do This Shit On Purpose?

I'm not one of those drive-all-the-way-around-a-parking-lot-to-find-a-close-spot-to-save-40-feet-of-walking people. People that do that are dumb.

I pull into a large parking lot and park in the first spot I see, no matter how far it is. 100% of the time I get into the store before the douchle (love that word) that drove in a circle three times until the third space from the front door opened up.

That's not my point though. Do what you want, drive in circles like a mini-mall Nascar driver, I don't care. You look dumb, people point and laugh and you're blissfully ignorant about it because you think you're being efficient. You're really just a lazy moron with zero foresight.

My point this: Do NOT park next to me. When I park all the way in the back, with no one around me there's a message being said there. Look around, you'll see a ton of other spots in which to put your stupid car. Plus, I know you did that just to be an asshole.

So, that being said, if you do park next to me, and squeeze me in on top of it, say goodbye to your sideview mirror, and say hello to a few new dents on your door.

You've been warned.

Asshole.